Sprechen Sie Deutsch? Jain.

by Marlon Viloria
(as published 3 years ago in MVP)

Cologne Cathedral Summer 08

A previous request from two bona fide Magsingalenos, who are also keen members of MVP site, has indeed prompted me to write something on Germany. There are of course countless and readily available information in the internet about the country from history, culture, tradition to politics, sports, sauerkraut but hardly anything that presents closer than a bird’s eye view, or based on prolonged observation as well as accumulation of nitty-gritty yet unbiased information. But more importantly perhaps is someone who can also relay information in a ‘user-friendly’ manner. Oftentimes, reading literatures written formally about a certain country generates less enthusiasm, and as a result, absorbing key facts does not seem to sink in properly in my head. I always believe that conveying something to anybody for whatever reason or purpose, the language used has to be plain, simple and enticing enough for a reader to read it through to the end. And if possible and appropriate, be presented with a touch of humour too... the creaming of a cake so to speak. A reader smiling in between while reading what you’ve written is, to me, a fulfilment in itself.

Let me start. In the past, for 2 years, I worked in Munich for a global German company, in the state of Bavaria which is the biggest and arguably the richest among Germany’s 16 states. It was where I started to learn something about the German people, and the country as a whole. Their working culture in my opinion is something to be desired, one that I truly admire and can learn a great deal more from them. Everyone takes their work seriously and they are no-nonsense type of people, which means direct talking is preferable. There is a strong emphasis on the divide between business and pleasure and if you are not up to the job, they won’t hesitate to say frankly to your face. If you are an emotional and sensitive kind of person (as the majority of Pinoys are) then you’ve already lost the battle before the war has even begun because you would think they are ruthless, cold and calculating people to work with. But that’s just the way they are, nothing personal, it’s only business. You just need to be a quick learner, adapt then go with the flow.

Neuschwantein Castle

On the other hand, if you prove yourself to be an asset, you would be admired and respected too – the German way, i.e. no verbal praise or nice words but you just feel it through their body language and the way they talk to you… at least in my experience anyway. They seem to be taking education very seriously and would go all the way too as many Germans I’ve worked with have PhD’s on their names. And they are proud to include that title, Dr, in their business cards, or even in their email signatures, a status whose clear message is simply to take that person seriously, no bulls*. They work very methodically; their minds are sharp and generally perfectionists in nature. But I guess that’s also how they are slurred as serious people with dry or no sense of humour, one amongst many prejudices, and based on my observation; there is a degree of truth in that. But having said that, the quality of their craftsmanship is outstanding and is mirrored by the products they make and export to other countries. Their scientific and engineering prowesses in all fields are simply one of the best and had their psyche not been severely dented by their World War 2 history, the country would undoubtedly be a military as well as an economic superpower. That part of history makes them uncomfortable - a tragic event that resulted in the creation of two states, East and West, and whose political ideologies were divided into Marxism and capitalism. Now a reunified Germany, it’s the richest country in Europe and the third largest economy in the world behind US and Japan, but the biggest exporter of them all. Their government runs the country in the black, not in the red even in these difficult economic times, i.e. no budget deficits that need to be filled in by borrowing money from somewhere. They have some of the best designs and technologies on earth. For example, their Maglev train (magnetic levitation), or floating train, is simply amazing, which is now operational in Shanghai too. Or, the cars they build alone, brands like Porsche, Mercedes Benz or BMW make a mouth-watering desire to own and drive one.

Which brings me to the topic of driving in Germany, most specifically on their autobahns, or expressways and motorways as we call them in the Philippines and UK respectively. If you like driving fast and an adrenaline junkie, then driving in Germany is the perfect place to do it. Although there are areas where speed limit is imposed, not many Germans obey those restrictions since a long stretch of the autobahn is unrestricted and you can drive as fast as you like or as fast as your car can go. It’s quite normal to see cars speeding at 160 – 200 km per hour, and beyond. I once went driving with a friend to Frankfurt from Munich, which is about 400 kilometres away, and took us just over 2 hours to get there, including one stopover! That’s almost the same distance as Manila to Magsingal, which would take at least 8 hours to drive at night time these days, or a gruelling 12 hours + if you intend to travel during the day. Mind you, he drives a high-performance sports car (Porsche Carrera 4S), and driving it at such high speed is a breeze and hardly noticeable despite overtaking almost everybody. And it’s quite interesting to know that Germany has one of the lowest road accidents in Europe, but when it happens you can be sure of havoc with multiple fatalities too. My wife is always nervous sitting beside me whenever my family came over and we go cross-country driving. She keeps reminding me to slow down, using the kids sitting at the back as an excuse, although it’s quite obvious she’s the one frightened due to the frequency of her deep breaths. My typical reply is, ‘while in Rome, do as the Romans do’, which is rather more irritating to her than comforting. But as long as you are in control of yourself and alert with good anticipation, it is quite safe to do so. Don’t do it if you easily get nervous though, a slight mistake can be fatal which could even affect other motorists too.

Garmish

In the city of Munich, one of the best months in the calendar year is October. This is when the 2-week beer festival event takes place, appropriately called Oktoberfest, held annually which is now approaching its 176th consecutive year, attended by all beer enthusiasts and tourists alike from all over the world. It is held in an area near the city centre and it’s composed of about 14 giant tents, each one as big (or bigger and wider) as our church in Magsingal, each has a stage in the middle where bands play live music, usually at a deafening volume. Each one has its own big kitchen where you can try any of their renowned sausages, or simply roasted chicken or grilled fish, and each serves its own brand of German beer, by the litre in a big thick glass. All their beers are made of natural ingredients only, i.e. no chemicals like many mass-produced beers available in the market. They pride themselves as the best beer makers in the world, and the evidence is quite clear too as some of their universities offer a full degree course in beer making alone!

In that event, it’s quite entertaining to see groups of people representing their country and sporting their unique and individual uniform but rather eccentric form of identities, usually comes with a funny wig or hat too. For instance, the Scottish wear their traditional kilts, Aussies wearing their familiar rugby shirt or with a kangaroo emblem, the Dutch wearing orange soccer shirt, green for the Irish, etc, etc…or the Japanese with their camcorders and cameras taking shots of…well anything and everything really. I also met a group of business-type Pinoys as they were all wearing suits, but hardly a dress code for a binge-drinking occasion. Imagine them coming out of a tent with red faces and sleepy eyes, zigzagging in the middle of the road wearing suits! That would surely make an interesting scene and good enough for the Japs to redirect the focus of their cameras or camcorders. The atmosphere in each tent is simply electrifying, all in the name of fun and beer drinking. There is also a fanfare area nearby where families with kids can go and enjoy themselves too, and numerous stalls selling food or souvenirs for those curious-only visitors.

Scenic view at the German-Austrian border

But personally, the most fascinating about the event is the Bavarian people themselves wearing their traditional Bavarian attires. The men wearing leathers from head to foot – leather Trilby-style hat, traditionally embroidered shirt covered with a brown leather blazer, brown leather trousers down to knee level followed by a long thick pair of grey socks and a pair of leather sandals or shoes too. And hear this boys…the women wearing Cinderella-type dresses or the like, their cleavage kind of squeezed up showing half of those assets but could reveal almost everything even in just a slight forward bend! No one is denying that it is a complete turn-on for men, a natural Viagra for those whose libidos are waning...or to rephrase it in a more subtle way, those whose minds are still willing but their bodies are somehow weakening! It’s quite like those Amish women in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, but only sexier and more revealing. And to me personally, it symbolises elegance, sophistication and pure femininity.

There are of course other tourist’s places to visit or shopping areas where everyone can indulge themselves too, from bargain street vendors to millionaires’ boutiques. And just like Manong Mario said, the country, like any European country, has many palaces, castles and museums to see. In Bavaria, the most touristic state in Germany, the Neuschwanstein Castle is the most visited one, its exterior design copied by Disney for all its theme parks around the world. In Munich alone, there are many beautiful and well-preserved Roman Catholic churches, their interior designs are some of the best in the world. I guess everyone is now aware that the current Pope came from Bavaria. For those nature enthusiasts, there are big lakes or rivers around Germany, the River Rhein (or Rhine or Rijn depending on which country you are) being the biggest and longest I think, as it flows through 3 countries – Germany, France and the Netherlands respectively, where boats or smaller type of ships are used for river cruising and tourism, or small cargo ships can sail and be used to transport goods. Alternatively, one can visit the Black Forest where the famous wooden cuckoo clock is made. The Alps is only a few hours drive away too, either in the direction to the Austrian border or to Switzerland, which is much more fascinating to me to explore. Just by looking at those high blue mountains glazed with ice or snow on top simply amazes me with awe (photos enclosed). There always seems an eerie of silence, of quiet reflection and a deep sense of spirituality in me whenever I immerse myself with nature of such outstanding beauty.

During the summer, it is simply the best time of year to visit Germany, particularly Munich, the capital of Bavaria. The bars and restaurants are buzzing with people, day and night, especially in the area of Schwabing, an upmarket place, home of BMW and where I used to live too. Adolf Hitler, in his younger age apparently lived in an apartment at a street (Schleissheimer) near me too. You can easily find a place that caters your taste of food or music. It was also where I learned to enjoy Ethiopian cuisine, which I initially ignored due to the way it is served. All food are served in one big round thing where everyone can share – (just an info for those who have not tried yet: kasla koma bigao a bassit (could be chinaware too), nga naap-apan ti pancakes sa naparabawan ti nadumaduma a potahe, adda sauce na ken awan, sa agkammet ka nga mangan!). Obviously, the idea of ‘kinnammetan’ was not the issue for me, being a master of the art myself especially when eating innapoy and tinapa, but merely due to hygienic reasons, i.e. whom you are sharing your plate with. But I was intrigued why the restaurant was always full of Germans or other nationalities…and to cut the story short, I became a regular customer too.

The English Garden, its famous park, is always full of people having picnic, bbq, playing ball games or simply sunbathing. But a walk by the man-made river in the middle of the park is an unforgettable experience in itself! Why? Let me tell you why. In my first summer in Munich, there was one weekend I decided not to go home to the UK. I went out for a walk by the River Isar near the zoo (not the one in the park), in the Thalkirchen area, wearing a typical summer clothes – short pants, t-shirt and a baseball cap but somehow forgot to bring my sunglasses too. As soon as I reached the river, I was completely shocked. Wow, what a view!  Men and women were either half-naked or completely nude, lying by the river banks or having a dip in the water, which is kind of gross to watch fellowmen running into the water with their juniors swinging up and down or sideways. Nothing was left to the imagination, I’m telling you. This must be heaven on earth! But I quickly realised I was an ‘intruder’ as I was fully clothed while the majority were not. I couldn’t hide my embarrassment; I was not even wearing a pair of sunglasses so I could at least look at the women…discreetly! So I immediately made a detour and headed into the woods, which is also near and in parallel with the river banks on both sides. But to my surprise and disbelief, I also met lovers, young and old, holding hands, having a walk…but completely naked. God Almighty! I must be in a different planet, my thoughts momentarily.

I decided to make a u-turn and headed back home and did not know what to make of it all. There was a sense of bewilderment and couldn’t tell whether I felt disgusted, appalled or amazed and ecstatic. As soon as I reached my apartment, I picked up my sunglasses and decided to continue my walk in the park (English Garden), which was near my apartment too, a place more comforting for someone who just got a shock of his life. It is a big park so I walked aimlessly, passing groups of people or families doing their own thing and not caring where I ended up with. So I reached this part where there’s a small river, a man-made one, in the centre of the park. What the hell…, a lot of people were also sunbathing there and most women were also half-naked… topless I mean. I also saw a few who were completely naked, but at least not as many as before and seemed to be more discreet in choosing their spots to lie down naked. Frankly, I felt a little bit disturbed seeing these naked people in the middle of a crowded park where families with kids were not far away. For children’s sake, I thought it was an act of vulgarity and indecency or even immorality but I soon realised that the kids are actually used to seeing such things and no sign whatsoever of malice or perversion or of disturbed appearances from anybody around…except tourists I guess. In this respect, I surely can not do as the Romans do. No way Jose!

So you’ve been warned, just in case you intend to visit the country during the summer sometime in the future, take advice from someone who has learned his lesson the hard way: don’t ever forget to bring your pair of sunglasses, and preferably, it should be as dark as possible so your eyes can not be seen focussing on matters of anatomical interests. Sightseeing (human) nature at its best!

Now, isn’t that enticing enough for you?