Valerie's Graduation

by Marlon Viloria

The big day was looming and with the anticipated arrival of my mother-in-law to join us in celebration, it became more real than apparent that it was going to be an extra special day. With the usual razzmatazz filling up the air and further aggravated (or adding more hype) by my wife’s preoccupation of what everyone has to wear on the occasion, it was bound to be a day full of excitement, of lasting memories, a day of utmost importance to the family. This was of course the day when our daughter Valerie was going to graduate from university, the London School of Economics, on 11 July 2012.

My wife and I have not felt pride of such magnitude until this day when Valerie walked up to the stage in recognition to her academic achievements, gaining a joint-degree in Mathematics and Economics with Honours at this prestigious institution. Descriptions of words such as ‘pride’, ‘proud’ or ‘joy’ were less meaningful until this time when it became personal to us, when such accolades afforded to our child seemed to flow freely and directly into every cell of our bodies too, presumably triggering some chemical reactions in our brains thereby producing serotonin levels of exponential proportions…so to speak!

The lasting effect of such euphoric feelings which made our efforts much more worthwhile might also have been the result of a prolonged process of maintaining self-discipline all the way coupled with the sustainability of support, morally and financially, together with a little luck. That in spite of the many hurdles in between, keeping focussed on the bigger picture and reaching that goal was never compromised. Or, in the event of some mishaps or fall, the ability to get up, dusted ourselves off and continued the journey might have also played its part. Who knows! But of course, such summation of events that led us to this day could be over simplified now that a particular destination has been reached, and it was never really that dramatic nor emotional as other people would like to portray. And neither has there been any secret apart from living our lives as normal, taking one day at a time, making ourselves busy by performing our daily obligations and doing things we are interested in and before we knew it, we’ve accomplished something in return.

I digress. Where great men professed great things, there are indeed many roads leading to Rome. But when the tides of virtues rise against you, signifying an abrupt end to a promising bright future, those same roads could then lead to dark tunnels, despite of the initial premise that they were paved with good intentions. So steering your life in either direction is a choice you have to make personally, but hopefully a well-thought-of choice…or if unsure which way, at least a mechanism to calculate risk and adapt rapidly to any unforeseen circumstances is in placed. For the path to an unbeaten track can be perilous and unpredictable, it is also full of thrills and excitement. In contrast, the tranquillity and beauty of a well-paved path where each side of the track is landscaped and horticultured, the journey is a breeze and pleasant one but can be less exciting too. The rule is quite simple if applied, put your money where your mouth is and never put the cart before the horse, which simply means that back your words with deeds and do it in the right order.

As mentioned in an earlier note I wrote awhile back, Valerie has always been consistent in her endeavours. I remember the day when she left home to begin her course and stayed at LSE student’s hall. The worries I felt that time of her assumed inability to look after herself, or for not being too streetwise enough to face an open world was nerve-racking. But as time went by, it became evident that she was more than capable and resourceful enough to meet such challenges. I guess I was just being emotional then with a subconscious thought that it was not just the end of the beginning but the beginning of the end of living away from the comforts of our own family nest. Retrospective of the chain of events, it was also the beginning of a new beginning, the beginning of an era to make a life of her own, equipping herself with the right tools and skills to search for greener pastures, or fight and win her own battles…a cyclical process in the survival of the human race.

Time will tell of course if she will live a happy and successful life. That would be her own making as a result of many decisions she will make in her life along the way. However, I trust Valerie’s judgement and her ability to assess a given situation instead of opting a knee-jerked reaction born out of desperation or frustrations. For sure, we will always be there to guide and support her and give our piece of advice should she feel the need to consult us. And to that end, my wife and I can only hope and pray that she will realise her dreams…and more importantly perhaps, become a beacon of hope and inspiration, as well as a guiding star to her kid sister, Jessica.